Tuesday, February 28, 2006

We Got Hosed, Tommy. We Got Hosed.

They did it to me again! It's Tuesday. Everybody familiar with Central Standard knows that today is Chicken Nugget Day in the school cafeteria. It's on the lunch menu. It was in the paper on Sunday. I was ready, two dollars and twenty five cents in hand.

Of course, today was also a play cuts/quiz bowl assembly (at which Coach B did a rousing karaoke of "Sweet Child of Mine" to drum up support for the upcoming Kewpie Idol competition--my man had some moves working today, let me tell you). Classes were thirty minutes each--including lunch. I guess the cafeteria staff decided that thirty minutes was not sufficient time to sling chicken nuggets and mashed potatoes to 2000 kiddos. They're probably right. So, instead of my prized chicken nuggets, I got a crummy piece of French bread pizza (don't get me started on the "cultural invasion" being perpetrated by the French--bread, cuffs...damn!), some corn and some overcooked cauliflower and squash. What a disappointment. Not to mention the fact that I had about fifteen minutes to eat.

And now, after that disappointment, I sit here typing with the godamn bass drone of some yahoo's car stereo as he sits out front of one of the houses around the corner. Monotonous, annoying, and nauseating. A weaker man than I might go put a slug into that freaking stereo.

That's all I got, for now. I hope February was good to everyone. It was quite alright to me.

Update: the bass drone is over. I can think again. Oh, no, wait, it was just the end of one song and the pause before another. I hope his freaking fillings fall out.

Peace, brothers and sisters.


Jill said...

Gotta love Chicken Nugget Day. :) Our high school had these revolting french bread pizzas that were 83% cardboard, 11% sauce and 6% cheese. Ugh.

I was using the 'Next Blog' function to see who my new blog neighbors were today. Thought I'd say hi. :) Hope you don't mind.

ATR said...

Don't mind at alll. Thanks for the comment. Eleven percent is a pretty high sauce content for institutional French bread pizza!

Anonymous said...

Wow, that is so crazy! The fortune in the Chinese cookie I had today reads, "If you hang your hopes on a chicken nugget, you're sure to find disappointment in a floppy limp slice rather than a firm tender piece of real meat." Even Imo's would benefit from hanging their hopes suchingly because that is some isht excuse for some 'za if'n you know what I'm sayin.

And of course we're all inspired by Flava Flav: "Bass in your face"!


Monkey Critic said...

Monkey say not to worry. There not much chicken in those nuggets, anyway.